8 Things Moms Should Not Feel Guilty About

It is a fact of modern motherhood that so much of our daily life is infused with feelings of guilt. A word that has such negative connotation, guilt can be negative and manipulative, and even paralyzing if you allow it to dictate your daily decisions.

In fact, too much guilt can become not just a “feeling,” but an all-encompassing way of life. This kind of guilt will consume you and take over your life!

Why not use little moments of “helpful guilt” as a guide to make better decisions – and focus on reinforcing your positive priorities in life. Try to give yourself more credit for making the best choices possible in every moment. Moms need to let go of guilt and start practising self-care and positive affirmation.

Here are 8 things you should definitely not feel guilty for doing.

Having a Date Night with Your Partner – Alone!

It is important for couples to keep the passion alive in their marriage. Focusing your attention on your spouse does not diminish your love for your baby. If anything, happier marriages make for more strongly connected families. As a woman, you need intimacy and affection in your life, outside your role as a mother. Wanting that should not make you feel guilty.

Taking a Day Off To Do Something Fun

Being a mom is a tough job – so why do we expect moms to never take a day off? At any other job, you’re entitled to paid leave and sick days and other perks; so be sure to renegotiate your “mom contract” to get the rest and relaxation you need.

Overindulging on Something Decadent

Breastfeeding burns calories, so don’t feel bad about boosting your caloric intake now and then with a favourite dessert!

Wearing Clothes that Are Comfortable and not fashionable

We all laugh about “mom jeans” and the tendency of moms to fall into a fashion rut where they barely can leave the house in anything but sweat pants and spit-up-stained shirts. However, the truth is that you are working hard and juggling a lot. There is no shame in giving up on the expectation that you have to look ravishing and well put together all the time. It is most important to NOT compare yourself to others.

Binge Watching Your Favourite Show on TV

Sometimes you need an escape, especially after the kids are asleep. So, do not feel bad about enjoying your favourite shows, or even your guilty-pleasure “mindless TV” dramas or “chick flick” movies. Moms have a lot to think about all day, and sometimes you just need to relax in front of the TV – no guilt at all there!

Closing the Bathroom Door and Locking It

(Making Sure Kids Are Safe with Someone)

Sometimes you just need to get away from the incessant, ever-accelerating demands of your children with just 5 or 10 minutes alone in the bathroom. Just being able to use the toilet by yourself, without an audience feels like a mini-holiday.

Not Having Enough Quality Time with Your Kids

Many moms have the feeling that they should somehow be engaging with their kids at every minute of the day – but this is just not realistic! After all, you have so many other things to do, and you need to have a life of your own as well. So let the children play alone. Independent play is an important learning and growth experience for children.

Losing Your Temper Now and Again

Every mom has those moments where she overreacts to misbehavior. This is OK. Life is hard, and parenting can be exhausting. We’re all doing the best we can with limited sleep, time and resources. You are not a machine.

Be kind to yourself – and do not feel guilty about perceived shortcomings, mistakes and weaknesses. Celebrate life as a mom in the truest sense – your kids and partner will love the real you.

Do you think that moms tend to be too hard on themselves? Why or why not? What other things do you think mothers should give themselves a break about doing? Please join the conversation, “like”, and share this article to keep the conversation going.


Medela offers breastfeeding accessories and breast pumps to mothers in Quebec and around the world. A long-time champion of breastfeeding, Medela is the only company to develop products based on the latest research by leading breastfeeding experts and feedback from breastfeeding mothers. As a result, Medela pumps are the number one choice for healthcare professionals, healthcare facilities and mothers around the world. Only you can provide what’s best for your baby. Medela can help.

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