Dealing with bullies

Avoiding problems

Being a bully’s parent is not easy either but it is a position where you can do much more and have a bigger impact. At home, you can do two things: defuse your child’s anger and stop over-preventing with young children.

If your child is aggressive, it is your duty to channel his hostility. Find the source of his rage, consult a psychologist or enrol him in a demanding sport without contact. Whatever happens, never assume that things will get better eventually or hope that his teacher will take care of all the discipline. Everything that concerns your children is your responsibility. You must make them become good classmates and good citizens.

If you have been bullied yourself and fear for your children, do not overly prepare them to deal with bullies that do not yet exist. A parent who tells his child: "if someone bothers you at school, defend yourself! " somehow gives permission to fight back against any kind of aggression. If your child fails to understand what you mean, he could get angry against a child who just refused to play with him and eventually become a bully.

The consequences

Bullying is no small affair. Cases of runaways and suicides are too many, the sorrow of these children is too great and the school structure does not give them enough loopholes. Studies on 1,420 participants in England and in the US3 also showed that victims of bullying are affected negatively during these difficult times and struggle to cope with the aftermath. That’s why we must act, and we must do so as soon as possible.

If you have trouble talking to your child, meet a psychologist. They say it takes a village to raise a child and this is even truer when that child is in distress. Later on, when all this is over, you'll be surprised to see how your child’s school can be fun and safe again.


  1. Un tiers des élèves victimes d’intimidation au secondaire (In French)
  2. First steps to stop bullying: Adults helping children aged 4 to 11
  3. Psychiatry
Image de Anne Costisella

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