So it is important not to force yourself to do something if your heart is not into it. However, maintaining the connection with your partner does not just mean making love. “Hugging, giving a massage or simply holding each other, naked in bed, are easy ways to help you maintain the connection. Sometimes, a simple small gesture will do the trick too. When you’re pregnant or a new mother, you are hypersensitive. Personally, I will always remember the time when my boyfriend came home from work with a bag of M & Ms, my ultimate indulgence! So even if it wasn’t much, it meant a lot to me. He had taken the time to do something special for me”, remembers Julie Pelletier.
No more pressure
Many books on pregnancy and motherhood say that after a few weeks, women can reclaim their sexuality as before. "We often read that 6 weeks after giving birth, everything should be back to normal. We all agree that there’s a huge gap between theory and practice! It puts way too much pressure on women! Becoming a parent is full of turmoil. And in the weeks following childbirth, women are in a process of reclaiming their bodies ", says Julie Pelletier. You must learn to feel beautiful and accept your transformed body... the body that just gave life.
Your spouse tells you you’re beautiful and you don’t believe him? “Accept the compliment and run with it. It’s precious!, adds Pelletier.
Give yourself some time…
“To get back to your own pace and full desire, give yourself as much time "after" giving birth as the duration of your pregnancy. If after nine months, if you find that things are not back to normal or that the problem persists, it could be good to see a specialist. But meanwhile, just go with the flow, adjust according to your mood, maintain the connection with your spouse and spend time together”, suggests Julie Pelletier.
