When your teen refuses to follow

Christmas parties are coming and you might be beginning to worry about your teenager who feels misplaced in family reunions. Should you insist or not?

What should have been a wonderful evening turned into a disaster! Your parents convinced you to go because your cousins would be there but they are not. You ended up being the only teenager there and you are bored. Who will pay for that? Will you sulk? Complain? Whine? Ask your parents to leave? Between you and me, no one must pay for that. It is only a few hours in your long life that has just begun.

You keep mumbling and when it is time to leave, you refuse to thank your hosts. Why? Is it so important to show everyone how disappointed you are? Just thank your hosts and you will be congratulated for your good manners.

Say it loud and clear: Thank you!

Rules of decorum are often forgotten when emotions (such as deception) take over. Here are a few suggestions to avoid another disaster, because there is nothing worse, for hosts than knowing that one of their guests is unhappy!

Tips for teens

It is not impolite to ask your parents to check if other people your age will be present. However, you can survive one night spent with younger children and adults.

  • You can ask your host if you can bring a book or games. They will know right away that you will probably walk away when adults start talking.
  • It is rather rude to bring books and games without asking!
  • You must remain at the table throughout the meal. You should not ask to leave the table before eating your dessert.
  • You can offer your help for service or dishes. If you do so, your gesture will be noticed. If you are not comfortable, quietly tell your parents.
  • You should not play a videogame, talk over the phone or read at the table but you should take advantage of this situation to participate in discussions without stealing the show.
  • Adults should encourage a teen who wants to take part in a discussion. In the past, it was forbidden for a teenager to talk but times have changed. If you are asked to remain quiet, stay calm. Listen to the conversations and you can give your opinion later, at home.
  • This moment with friends is not the right time to send “messages” to your parents. Avoid negotiating while you have witnesses, thinking that it will help you win.


Leaving childhood is being able to understand that we are no longer the center of the world and to accept an equal place without ruining the atmosphere.

Honesty always counts and any adult must understand that a teenager who can stay alone at home will prefer to do so rather than spend a long evening with adults. It is even appropriate for you to tell your child what the hosts represent for you. Never keep information from your teenager because that is how the lack of respect will begin.

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