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Deciding to have a second child

You have been dreaming of another child for a long time and your daughter would love to have a little brother but it is such an important decision! Should you have a second child?

Several mothers wonder if they should have another child. Some would like to give a little brother or a little sister to their only child; others would like to have a big family. On the other hand, several mothers wonder if they are ready for this new beginning. It is a big question and it deserves to be pondered deeply. Here are a few thoughts and advices based on the useful tips sent by mothers from Motherforlife.com.

Each child changes everything

You already know that a baby represents a lot of joy and many responsibilities but did you know that each child deeply changes your family life? Of course each child is different and his personality adds a new dimension to your family but his presence also multiplies the interactions between individuals. Children will have new partners to play with and it will make it easier for you to do what you must. However, the need for attention will be doubled and new rivalries will appear. Each child will grow and each person that they will become will change your life. Therefore, having another child will require a period of adaptation but will also add new tones to your family.

Acceptance

For some, it is the idea of never being pregnant again that generates a huge stress. Some mothers are so keen on being pregnant that they bear someone else’s child. However, and even it is if difficult to give up on your big belly, the love of pregnancy is not a good reason to have a child. You must really want to take good care of the child who will be born. You must also remember that beyond your belly, there is a dad who has a say in the matter and a child who will need as much love and stability as his brothers and sisters.

Health and age

Many more factors must be taken into consideration. Among them, aging seems to be what worries most future mothers who fear that potential diseases and fatigue will impact the life quality of their future child. However, for several years, the average age to have a baby has risen. In Quebec, the average age of maternity rose to 30 years old in 2011 and, frankly, families are not suffering from it. However, you should keep in mind that it becomes more difficult to get pregnant as you get older and the risks of complications increase. If your health is fragile, you should talk to your doctor before making your decision.

Your guts

A lot of mothers told us that we should follow our instincts. If it is true that some factors like your health, the state of your couple and your financial capacities should influence your choice; the final decision should still be made with your heart.

Do not have a child because you only have girls and want a son. Do not have a child because you fear that your only child will be lonely, he won’t be. Do not have a child because you are afraid of never being pregnant again. Have a child because you still have love, time and energy to give and because you want to add a new member to this family that you already love so much.

By Anne Costisella

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